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Jo was beautiful, I was cute, I suppose, but he made me feel beautiful, like a goddess. I smiled up at him, ‘Liar,’ I said, ‘my boobs are too small, my bum’s to big and I’m ugly!’ He laughed down at me, ‘You’re fishing again,’ he said, ‘I think that you’re beautiful. Tu sei una bella donna, ti amo, Caroline, ti amo.’ And he leant down and kissed me, softly, tenderly. I melted there on his bed. Oh how I loved him then. He pulled away and looked down at me again, and softly began to speak, ‘Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?’ and he kissed me again. ‘Thou art more lovely and more temperate:’ and he caressed my cheek. ‘Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,’ now undoing my blouse. ‘And summer’s lease hath all too short a date:’ another button. ‘Sometimes to hot the eye of heaven shines,’ another button. ‘And often is his gold complexion dimmed,’ again. ‘And every fair from fair sometime declines,’ the last one. ‘By chance, or nature’s changing course untrimmed,’ another. Did the others in the room noticed this? Did Darrell? I wasn't sure. I consider myself an attractive 45-year old white woman. I am tall and have long blond hair with a decent body, but I certainly would not assume that a handsome younger black man like Darrell would really be interested in someone like me. Let me just say, I am happily married, and my husband is a very loving and attentive partner. But I must admit that after 20 years of marriage, the frequency of our intimacy has slowed, and the passion has waned a bit. But more importantly, I have carried a deeply held secret that I have never confided to anyone; my deep physical attraction to attractive black men. Ever since I was a young woman I found myself drawn to the dark good looks of a strong, athletic male figure, but I never had the nerve to fulfill that fantasy when I was younger.I grew up in a predominantly white, conservative suburb. Perhaps it was the taboo, and the hint of possible scandal, that both excited me and.
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